When you think of the word “balance”, what comes to your mind? For me, in the past, I thought of a picture of a balance scale in which one stone on the left side weighs exactly the same as three stones on the right and it is perfect and plum.

But balance, when it comes to work life balance, is not a noun. It is not that static image that shows up on google about the stones. Balance is a verb and a verb is an action word. Balance is something you do constantly. Several factors continue to shift and you respond to them. You perform the balancing act. Perhaps you already know this. 

But here’s where I’m going. If there’s a moment, you feel that things are out of balance. Remember that this moment does not define you. This moment describes a static experience, a noun-moment, if you will pardon the grammar. This moment tells you that there is a need to take the action of balancing.

Secondly, because balance is a verb, something you do and not a static state, it means that the process of balancing is continuous.

Give yourself some grace especially when things feel so out of balance.

Ex 16:20:8-11 8 “Remember the Sabbath day and keep it holy. 9 Six days you shall labor and do all your work. 10 But the seventh day is a Sabbath to the Lord your God; you shall not do any work—you, your son or your daughter, your male or female slave, your livestock, or the alien resident in your towns. 11 For in six days the Lord made heaven and earth, the sea, and all that is in them, but rested the seventh day; therefore the Lord blessed the Sabbath day and consecrated it.

This commandment is very striking. Take note of the list of beings that get to rest. First it is all humans regardless of their social status and position: male and female, parents and children, masters and slaves; and citizens and foreigners. Second, not just humans but also animals: such as livestock. The reason for this goes back to Genesis 1. Because God rested and the 7th day is holy this is why everyone human and animal too must rest.

In our world today it is easy to get the impression that rest is a luxury: that you have to be rich to be able to “afford” that trip or that you work before you earn “vacation” time or that it is when you “retire” you can rest. The Bible in this passage tells us something different. Everyone no matter of status is required to rest because their rest is holy. All humans are equal in rest. Humans and working animals too are equal in their rest.

Say with me: It doesn’t matter my social status, financial status, or even what the Human Resource department says. God says I deserve rest. 

Ask yourself: How can I ignore the noise of the world and treat my rest as sacred activity today?

The last post was about a case study of Sarah and her life’s stress. You can read about that here.

Given Sarah’s exhaustion from her different responsibilities, now let’s look at Sarah’s response:

The exhaustion from life was getting too much so Sarah decided to get a three day weekend break from her job. She went on a cruise. She had a nice time participating extensively in the events on the ship such as dance competitions and singing competitions. When she came back, she was tired from the trip. She resumed her work the next day and continued doing her best to survive.

Now let’s assess Sarah’s response: highlighting what is praiseworthy, what she could have done differently, and what next steps she should take in the future.

Praiseworthy

• We should also praise Sarah for recognizing that she needs a break. Some people may keep going nonstop. Recognizing that something is wrong is a good place to start.
• A cruise may be a nice way to relax, be in a different environment, experience something new.

What she could have done differently

• A cruise will not resolve the conflict between her and her spouse. She likely needs to find a way to directly deal with her husband and get their issues sorted out.
• Going on a cruise does not resolve the fact that Sarah has limited physical capacity to keep being a nurse while she has four children.

Next steps

• Sarah still needs to find a way to address her other problems. No amount of vacation will solve emotional tensions with her husband.
• Sarah next time should leave space to recover from the cruise before starting work the next day.

There are other points you may come up with. For now, I hope to encourage you to revise your experience and learn from it. Experience may be the best teacher. Reflection on experience is how we learn.

You deserve TROG!

The last two posts summarized Saundra Dalton-Smith’s ideas on the 7 types of rest. You can read the first one here and the second one here. I strongly recommend that you take time to focus on each type and examine yourself to see what you’re missing. Here is a case study.

Sarah has a full time job in healthcare as a nurse. The recent shortage of nurses means she works more than usual. She is also married and she has four young children. The oldest is 15 and the youngest is 3. Her two youngest children are ages 2 and 3. Recently, the 2 year old started to get clingy. The 3 year old started throwing tantrums. Her 12 year old is dealing with the emotional roller coaster of puberty. The 15 year old is dealing with school problems. On top of this, she and her husband have started having frequent misunderstandings and their conflicts are getting more difficult to resolve.

Let’s assess this: What types of rest(s) may Sarah need?

• Sarah needs emotional rest with regards to her relationship with her spouse.
• She needs physical and mental rest with regards to her work as a nurse.
• Perhaps she needs social rest away from her constant contact with people both at work and her children at home
• Creative rest may also be something that Sarah needs. It is not clear what she does for fun. She may not even have time for that.

This list is not exhaustive. But I hope this example helps you examine your situation and what types of rest you need.

The 7 types of rest based on Dr Saundra Dalton-Smith’s work. Here are the remaining three.

Read about the earlier ones here.

Type of rest	Definition	Signs of Deficit	Activities to rest
Emotional Rest	The ability to express how you truly feel and be your authentic self	Feeling burdened and having no one to talk to Feeling you have to keep quiet, give fake smiles Imposter syndrome	Reach out to trusted people  Get help from professional listeners (counsellors, therapists)
Social Rest	Has to do with relationships and feelings of connection to other people especially loved ones	You feel drained. Tired of dealing with people Feeling isolated/alone Feeling invisible	Spending time with loved ones (in person is better than virtual) or getting “me time”
Spiritual Rest	Having a sense of purpose and belonging to something bigger than us	Doubting that God loves you Staying away from places and people that remind you of God/spirituality	Praying, fasting, retreats, reading the Bible etc

I ask again, what kind of rest do you really need?

Dr Saundra Dalton-Smith has in her book, seven types of rest.

• Physical Rest
• Mental Rest
• Sensory Rest
• Creative Rest
• Emotional Rest
• Social Rest
• Spiritual Rest

Let’s look at 4 now:

Type of rest	Definition	Signs of Deficit	Activities to rest
Physical Rest	This about the physical placement of our whole bodies in space	Body aches, pain	Sleep, napping, stretching, massage, yoga, walking
Mental rest	This is about our minds and brain processes	Too much on the mind Can’t concentrate Can’t think straight Think or worry too much	Taking a break, staring into space, putting focus on breathing or other calming activity, learning to surrender
Sensory Rest	This has to do with our physical senses, avoiding over or understimulation	Spending too much time on devices, exposure to bright lights, sounds etc Irritation, agitation, anger	Restricting time spent on electronics, Spending time alone in dark/quiet places Stay longer in the bathroom
Creative Rest	This is about our capacity to enjoy beauty in any form	Feeling “blocked.” Thinking we are not as creative as someone else, feeling stuck on problems; Can’t remember the last time you daydreamed or played	Enjoy art, music, dance, creative writing, craft-making

How are you doing with each type of rest?

Sleep is the long stretch of physical relaxation that humans undergo usually at night in a quiet comfortable location. Naps are the short versions of sleep that happen usually midday.

Sleep is a central part of rest but rest is more than sleep.

Rest is the feeling of relaxation, calm, balance, and wholeness in all aspects of a person’s life. Dr Saundra Dalton-Smith considers 7 aspects of life needing rest: physical, social, sensory, creative, mental, emotional, and spiritual.

Sleep promotes all these 7 areas of rest but it primarily a physical type of rest.